Season 1, Episode 11: We Are Family

Season 1, Episode 11: We Are Family

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After John left the kitchen...

...There was the sound of a car pulling up to the house.

Bobby said, "That'll be Ellen and Missouri, back from the supply run." He hesitated, concern evident in his eyes. "You don't have to meet everybody right now."

"It's fine, Bobby," Marry assured him. She felt rattled, both by John's outburst and her own careening emotions, but she wasn't about to retreat back to her room.

"I'm no shrinking violet."

The women hunters came in the side door along with a gust of freezing winter wind.

"Here, Missouri, let me get that for you," Bobby said. "I want you to meet Mary Winchester."

"It's a pleasure, Mary. I'm Missouri Moseley." Mary couldn't help but like her immediately. Just shaking her hand made Mary feel calmer.

"Hey, Mary. I'm Ellen."

"I would say it's nice to meet you both, but I think incredible is more the word for it," Mary said. These were people from the life John led after her death. Meeting them was nothing less than miraculous.

Missouri's expression changed from welcoming to pained. Mary watched as she turned and focused on the hole in the drywall.

"John Winchester, you did not," she murmured.

"I take it you're the psychic," Mary said dryly.

"John did that?" Ellen demanded. She turned to Mary, offering her hand along with a sympathetic look. "Did he hurt you?"

"No, of course not," Mary said. "It was just a misunderstanding."

"Uh-uh." Ellen shook her head. "Even if he didn't lay a finger on you, that was abuse. We all care about John, but you're part of this family now, too, Mary. And nobody is gonna mistreat you. Not John. Not anybody."

"I'll talk to him--" Bobby began, but the women immediately drowned him out.

"That's a terrible idea," Ellen said.

"Good lord, no, Bobby." Missouri voiced her agreement with Ellen.

"It's fine. It's fine," Mary managed to get a word in. "He's my husband. This is out of character for him... Isn't it?" she asked, as the realization hit her in a way that seeing John with lines etched into his face and silver streaking his hair hadn't. John had lived a whole, long lifetime after she'd been murdered. He wasn't the same man she'd married. In many ways, he was a stranger to her.

"I knew John as well as anybody did, and I never saw him be violent like he was this mornin'. As a father, he made a lot of mistakes, but he loved your boys," Bobby reassured her.
"Talk to him," Ellen said, "but whatever's happenin' with John, know you don't have to go through it alone. We're all here for you."
"Thank you," Mary told them sincerely. She felt safe in a way she hadn't felt since being brought back from the dead. Bobby, Ellen, and Missouri were obviously good people. Friends. She knew she could trust them.

A while later, Mary found her way to John's room. Or rather, his suite of rooms, she corrected herself as she opened the door and found a living and dining area complete with a kitchenette. It was spacious, but drafty and unwelcoming. Her own room was worn, with faded wallpaper and furniture that had seen better days, but it was comfortable and homey. This was dingy and miserable.

"What's up with the decor in this place?" Mary asked unceremoniously as she entered John's bedroom.

"Mary? What are you doing here?"

Mary could read John's emotions in his expression, a mix of hope and confusion. He looked as if he'd half convinced himself he was never going to see her again. Mary almost wanted to laugh. An equal part of her wanted to cry.

"You're my husband, John. One outburst isn't going to stop me loving you," she said as she took a seat beside him on the sagging old cast-iron bed.

"The decor is mid-century cheap motel," John said.

Clearly avoiding giving her an apology, or even a discussion of what had happened in the kitchen, Mary thought, but she didn't press him.

"They outdid themselves with your rooms," she joked, but John didn't go along with her attempt to lighten the mood.

"You asked how I raised our boys. This is how," he said, gesturing at the dismal room. "One seedy motel after another, back and forth across the country, while I hunted. It was nothing like the life we'd imagined for them when we decided to start a family."

Mary did laugh then, even as she felt the hot prickle of tears trying to start welling up in her eyes. "I don't think too many young brides imagine being murdered by a demon."

"I was helpless. I couldn't save you." The pain in his voice made Mary's throat ache with unshed tears.

"I got totally obsessed with the supernatural," John went on. "I learned how to fight it, and it seemed the only way to keep Dean and Sam safe was to train them to fight it, too. I kept them safe, but at the cost of any sort of normal life."

"You did the best you could for them," Mary tried to reassure John.

"No. Bobby's right. I hurt them. I never abused them physically, but I wasn't a loving father. Mary, I treated our boys like Marine recruits at Parris Island, and that's no way to raise kids."

"You did the best you could," Mary repeated. "John, I know our boys grew up to be amazing, incredible men! And I know Dean and Sam forgave you."

"You sound so sure," John said. "For all you know, they hate my guts."

"I'm sure because they defeated Azazel. They wouldn't have even survived if you hadn't trained them. You did what you did out of love for them. I'm sure they understand that now."

"Maybe you're right," John said softly.

"Of course I'm right." Mary gave him a playful shove, determined to recapture the happiness of their reunion that morning.

"I love you, John Winchester, and our sons love you, too. Someday, years and years from now, they'll tell you so themselves."

"Won't that be something. We'll be a family again." John's voice was husky with emotion.

"And in the meantime, we've got a lot of catching up to do," Mary said, leaning in to close the distance between them.

"Mm-hm." John took the hint. He pulled her to him and kissed her.

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